The plus +, minus -, & neutral ~ on your energy
Where Your Attention Goes, Energy Flows
Summer is loading, and I’m back from a mini sabbatical-turned-adventure trip. Before I left, I was honed in on focus & attention, and SURPRISE — I still am.
Catch editions one, two, and three for questions to ask yourself and exercises to explore.
I’m still processing my time away and will likely be sharing stories of scuba, the wilds of travel, and insights that have deepened during my time away, but today’s email is more of a rant than a wander:
How can we pay attention to what matters when we’re conditioned to contribute until we are exhausted?
We’re taught that we have to hustle to earn rest, that a vacation is getting away for a few days — or at most a week or two if we’re lucky.
This is bullsh!t.
Seeing other parts of the world and meeting folks from Germany, Australia, France, Canada, and the Netherlands fired me up again about America’s culture of exceptionalism and how unextraordinary (and brutal) we are when it comes to putting people first and building human-centered societies.
As my friend Rebecca quipped during our walk yesterday: American exceptionalism only lasts until you have a passport.
While I’d like to burn down the systems and structures and start anew, we know that change is incremental and comes one person at a time.
There aren’t immediate answers to paying our bills, obtaining free & accessible healthcare, or sustaining supportive communities — but I do know this:
The world will always want more of you.
It is up to us to establish our boundaries, manage expectations, and be disagreeable sometimes by saying “no” to the things that aren’t aligned.
But how do you know what is aligned when it’s hard to find time to evaluate?
Here’s an exercise I’ve been doing this week as I return to “life-ing.” My clients love this simple exercise because it shows them where their energy is flowing, where it’s stalled, and how they spend their time.
For a week or two, write down all of your activities each day. Typically, an activity is something you’re doing, but sometimes it’s a thing you’re thinking about (or obsessing over!). Start recording in the morning when you wake up and continue throughout your day. You don’t have to account for every second, but try to write down most things. It may be helpful to batch certain activities — for example, I write down “morning routine” to encompass teeth brushing, showering, and getting ready for my day. I do, however, break out drinking my morning coffee on the porch, walking the dog, and picking out my clothes. When I’m thinking or working on something, I try to name the topic, activity, or client I’m working with to distinguish the type of mental (and emotional) activities taking place.
As you do the activity, notice how you feel. Does it give you energy? Does it drain you? Does your energy stay the same? Record that next to the activity (I use a plus + for positive energy flow, minus - when my energy is being depleted, and tilde ~ or circle ◦ for neutral energy levels).
Don’t overthink, make assumptions, or judge yourself. Keep it simple, sweetie! I keep track on a piece of paper — no fancy notebooks needed. When you are recording an activity, really take a moment to check in and notice how you’re feeling and how your energy is flowing. Normally, my daily porch coffee and client work refresh me, and picking out my clothes and working on calendar logistics drain me, but not always. Pay attention, and be kind to yourself as you do this. The goal isn’t to make changes, but to notice the moment you are in and how you’re showing up.
Assess your results at the end of two weeks. No, you don’t have to assign yourself a score, judge yourself into a doom spiral, or decide to quit everything and move to a foreign land (ok, maybe the last one), but it is important to see where your energy is going and how you’re spending your precious life.
Here are some assessment questions to ponder:
What do you notice about your time?
What energizes you consistently?
What depletes you?
Do you like what your days look like? Why or why not?
What can you streamline? What needs to be cut?
What is missing that you want to add in?
What are some opportunities you might explore to feel more aligned and energized?
Where can you be more gentle with yourself?
What needs must you voice to yourself and others to make more room for the things that energize you?
What changes can be made to support your flow?
Your inner you knows the answers. Practice noticing and listening to that voice inside.
Big sweeping actions rarely create sustainable change in ourselves or the world. They can be the catalyst, but the day-to-day moments become the transformation.
The better we become at slowing down and paying attention inside, the more we can adjust ourselves, bit by bit, for impact.
xox,
Michelle
P.S. I’m modifying some of the things I do and offer, and am interested in speaking with 75 or so people about how they pursue what matters to them. If you have 20 minutes, I’d love to chat and ask you some questions. Find out more here.
Scuba is definitely my new thing! Are you a diver? Let’s talk!
Use Your Voice.
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Presence is a practice. We have finite time, be here for it.
